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Writing, Iguanas, and Electronics

Fun & Terrible Writing Exercises

Daily or weekly writing exercises can be a fun way to practice the art of writing and break out of writer's block. In my case, I use the Title-O-Tron to generate a random "Pulp Sci-Fi" story name and write a 500+ word story in one sitting. These are intentionally rough and unedited because they are just a way to warm up for the "real" writing. If you read these, beware of grammatical, typographical, spelling, and structural errors!

These are not representative of a first draft or even an outline for a novel, they are more like early brainstorming efforts... based on terrible story prompts.

Enjoy!

Stephen Hermer

 
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The Ballad of Optimistic Billy 277 words

Billy had always loved wet Moria Village with its flooded, swampy landscape. It was a place where he felt afraid.

He was an optimistic, gentle, water drinker with fragile feet and ruddy eyes. His friends saw him as a foolish, but generous friend. Once, he had even jumped into a river and saved a nervous iguana. That's the sort of man he was.

Billy walked over to the window and reflected on his foggy surroundings. The rain hammered like exploding centipedes and smelled like earwig honey.

Then he saw something in the distance, or rather someone. It was the figure of Sophie . Sophie was a clever helpful girl with brown feet and brown eyes.

Billy gulped. He was not prepared for Sophie.

As Billy stepped outside and Sophie came closer, he could see the blushing glint in her eye.

"I am here because I want help," Sophie bellowed, in a clumsy tone. She slammed her fist against Billy's chest, with the force of 1099 rat. "I frigging love you, Billy ."

Billy looked back, even more concerned and still fingering the rusted metal knife. "Sophie, the ancients destroyed themselves," he replied.

They looked at each other with lonely feelings, like two smoggy, shrill spiders living at a very sinister ruin, which had drum music playing in the background and two understanding uncles digging to the beat of the drums.

Billy regarded Sophie's brown feet and brown eyes. He held out his hand. "Let's not fight," he whispered, gently.

"Hmph," pondered Sophie.

"Please?" begged Billy.

Sophie looked at Billy, her body blushing like a thundering, talented torch.

Then Sophie came inside for a nice drink of water.